You Are What You Eat Session Two

This time, in surround sound! Not really.

Stacy shows the guys how tough she really is.

PULLED PORK IS PEOPLE

You Are What You Eat Session One

Having more or less been kicked out of Gamwell, Burney, Chaz, and Seamus start the long drive back north. Two hours into their trip, hunger pains hit Chaz and Seamus, causing them to browbeat Burney into stopping at the first diner they see.

They stop into Rusty’s Diner, a bit of a dingy joint but the menu proclaimed that it had “the best burgers and pulled pork in the state ten years running”.

They decided to leave their rifles and shotguns in the car and brought only their handguns.

A bell rang when they opened the door, and shortly after, a man in his early twenties appeared and introduced himself. His name was Skip Barter and he told the guys to grab a menu and grab a seat wherever they wanted. Rusty would be along shortly to take their order.

As they went towards the bar, they noticed that the door to the women’s restroom was off one of it’s hinges. This place wasn’t in the best of condition. They perused the menu, and Chaz and Seamus decided to go for burgers, fries, and shakes. Burney wanted some pulled pork and a Coke. For the cocaine.

Eventually Rusty showed up and gave them the whole song and dance about them having the best burgers and pulled pork in the state ten years running. Then he took their order and was off to flip some burgers.

In the meanwhile, Chaz went off to the men’s room to clean up and Burney declared that he was going to check out the ladies’ room.

Keeper: WHAT
Burney: Not the restroom! Just the door!
Keeper: …..sure.

Burney inspected the door and noticed that a scuffle occurred and had knocked the door off a hinge. Rusty came back with their food and Burney promptly forgot about the door.

Nom nom nom

Seamus wolfed down his burger while Chaz and Burney were enjoying the food. Which is why they found the severed fingers in their burgers and sandwiches. Seamus ate whatever was possibly in his burger.

The discovery that the food IS PEOPLE turned their stomachs and they began violently retching around the bar. Skip came in to find out what was going on, and the guys began demanding answers. Skip turned to start running.*

(Note: I ended up playing Skip incorrectly. The book states that he is loyal and would fight to the death and I turned him into a cowering idiot. Oh well.)

Burney and Seamus attempted to knock out Skip, but Skip was able to dodge their blows. Then Chaz brought the THUNDER and Skip dodged directly into the THUNDER’s path. Hurting but still conscious, Skip ran through the kitchen and out the back door.

They followed out the back door and found themselves in a heavily forested area. Looking around, they saw a shed, a church, and a house in the distance. Chaz was trying to determine if he was looking at the Big Dipper. Muffled screams were coming from the shed and Skip was still making a break for it. Seamus pulled out his pistol, took aim, and hit Skip in the leg, causing him to stumble and yelp in pain.

Burney walked up to him and put his gun to Skip’s head, demanding to know why there were fingers in the food. Skip’s only response that it was just a joke, but the guy’s weren’t buying it. As Skip begged and pleaded, Seamus and Chaz noticed that he was pulling out a knife. Burney determined that Chaz was looking at the Big Dipper. Seamus shot and grazed Skip while Chaz decided to bring the THUNDER and crushed Skip’s skull.

Heading over to investigate the shed, Seamus opened the door and peeked inside. The shed was a slaughterhouse where Rusty prepared meat for the customers. Hooks lined the ceiling and a large meat grinder sat on a long table against the opposite wall. Also on the table was the torso of a human female. Her limbs had been cut off and her head was on the end of the table.

Chaz blanched at the sight, while Seamus and Burney were unaffected. Burney’s seen worse.

Chaz decided to head back to their car and grab the guns. Yeah, that won’t end in tears. The other two walked in and found a young lady hanging from one of the hooks.

Burney: Wait, is she hanging from the hook? From the skin on her back?
Keeper: Dunno, you can’t tell.

Burney walked up to her and asked “How’s it hanging?” Seamus kicked him in the shins.

Thus ends the first session.

Notes: I ran YAWYE because it’s a good transitory adventure, and it has a bit more focus on combat than the Crack’d did. I wouldn’t say that I’m running this one underprepared but I would say I’m running it fast and loose. Depending on how the players play this, they may get their first glimpses of magic and might get themselves an NPC ally. As long as they have fun, I’ll have had fun. Of course one thing I wouldn’t mind is if I could get one more player for the group.

Epilogue and Notes

The Crack’d and Crook’d Manse Epilogue

As they stood before the ruins of the Fitzgerald Manse, three cars pulled up behind them. Walter Dodge stepped out of his car, eyes wide with anger about the valuable piece of property that they had destroyed. Sheriff Whitford and some deputies had also arrived to check out the commotion. After a few moments, the sheriff asked the three investigators to join him at the police station. No, they weren’t under arrest, but their cooperation would do wonders.

After several hours in a cell, the sheriff stepped in and asked them what happened. Chaz proceeded to tell him the truth; about Arthur Curwen’s body, about the tentacles, and about the creature in the cellar. As Chaz started talking about the creature, the sheriff interrupted and said “So a gas explosion destroyed the mansion?” There was an awkward silence until Seamus said that it was a gas explosion that caused the damage. The sheriff wrote that down before stepping out of the cell and telling them that he had to make a phone call.

After several minutes of wondering why the sheriff left them in an unlocked jail cell, they stepped out and headed towards the back door. Seamus’s car was parked there with the keys in the ignition. They all climbed in and drove off into the night.

Notes

Being the very first game I had ever run, I decided to look for something that felt like a good introductory adventure for myself and my players. Having never played a game of Cthulhu before, I didn’t want to throw them into a long campaign, just in case they decided that Cthulhu wasn’t the game for them. I choose the Crack’d and Crook’d Manse because it’s a game that could probably be run in a few hours and because once the investigators get to the house, I don’t have to keep track of NPCs.

I spent a week (over)preparing for the game. I had index cards filled out with pertinent information of NPCs and I printed out the map and cut it up to show room placement. The board game Betrayal at House on the Hill was my inspiration for that.

When the game actually began, I was quite nervous. I didn’t know if I could run a fun game and if I’d start making these horrible mistakes that would ruin EVERTHING. I’m sure I made little mistakes but nothing terrible. As the game progressed, I discovered that I was terrible at giving out room descriptions. As of the end of the game, I still haven’t improved in that. My “boardgame-esque” style of exploring the house was a bit of a nuisance too, so I switched over to a whiteboards. And then combat happened and I felt odd about running it with just vague positioning of the investigators and monsters, so I got a battle mat. The short combat that occurred with the battle mat seemed to flow a bit smoother. I think I’m going to keep the whiteboards when I’m just showing rooms and whatnot but combat is strictly battle mat.

I had planned for the reporter Joe Virelli show up while they stayed at the house, but after almost three full sessions of explorations, I thought it was time to get the action going. Virelli was going to be the creature’s first victim, but when Burney decided to go to the master bedroom by himself, I sprung my trap. It also ended the session on a great cliffhanger, with Burney losing a full 6 points of SAN when he confronted the creature’s pseudopods.

Burney was able to get away that time, so while two of them were in the den, I kept them stuck upstairs by having the Creature surge forward and engulfing the first floor. Chaz saw it that time, but he passed his SAN check and decided to rejoin the group. At which point Burney ran back into the master bedroom by himself. And yes, he was attacked again.

The players had figured out the connection with salt very early on and were able to dispatch the tentacles without taking too much damage. I was happy someone failed their CON x 5 roll so I could describe how the monster was trying to kill them. Should’ve asked for a SAN check then, but c’est la vie. With the master bedroom sealed and salted, there wasn’t much else left to do but to let them escape. And escape they did. Once they got their feet on the ground, the highlight of the session was when John S. decided to look for windows and glimpsed the Creature. Still shocked that he only lost 1 SAN on the D20 roll. I didn’t think about this until later, but I should have made their escape a bit harder. Have a tentacle grab on to their rear bumper or something.

So they made it back to town, and I reminded them of the truck full of salt that had been ordered. They got the truck and drove it to the house. As they were preparing to throw open the wood cellar doors, I was wrestling with the decision of whether or not to have the Creature there. The book suggests that maybe the Creature had cleared out for a bit, but I decided that that would be a rather anticlimactic way to end their first adventure. So there it was and there it died. The sheriff also held the investigators until night so I could segue directly into their next adventure.

Re: the Creature, I misidentified it several times. I kept referring to it as having a pizza dough like color and consistency but after rereading the book, I saw that it was translucent and really slimy.

The players don’t know this, but with the three tentacles they destroyed brought the Creature’s hit points to 50. With a bit more salt they could have killed it without the dump truck.

I think my first adventure in Cthulhu went very well and I’m looking forward to the next mini-adventure I’m going to run. Now I have to change the name of my blog.

He somehow rolled a 1 on a D20.

Last time we left them, Seamus and Burney were ensnared by the slimy tentacles and Chaz had the brilliant idea to pour salt across the opening of the fireplace. As the two struggled to free themselves, the tentacles were taking damage due to the salt. Seamus broke out of the thing's grasp while the other tentacle, finding Burney momentarily weakened, forced itself down his throat and began expanding inside of him, drowning him and trying to crush his organs from the inside out. Chaz tried to bring the THUNDER, but failed miserably.

Eventually Burney was able to free himself, but he had to take time to retch and to get the thing out of him. Burney's into that kind of thing.

The salt took it's toll on the tentacles and they dropped onto the floor in a puddle of ooze. Having created a safe(r) haven for themselves, Seamus attempted to use his knowledge of firearms and mechanical repair to create shotgun shells full of salt. Unfortunately, he was only able to create two salt-filled shells.

Seeing no other option than escape, they fashioned a long rope from the bedsheets in the room, and were able to climb out and into the backyard. At which point Burney started looking around and wondering if there were windows on the ground floor.

Me, as Keeper: Yes, there are windows. ARE YOU LOOKING AT THE WINDOWS?
John S. aka Burney: .....
Me: ROLL FOR SANITY

He rolled, and he failed his Sanity check spectacularly. I believe it was somewhere in the 90s.

Me: You failed? Ok, roll a D20.
Morgan: What? A D20?
Me: Did you see the picture? That thing is messed up!

As John prepared to roll the D20, pure giddiness ran through my body as the anticipation of wreaking mental havoc was building. And then he rolled a 1. My jaw dropped.

Me: You are one lucky bastard. You lose 1 point in SAN.

Seamus wisely decided to look away from the house. But as Burney saw it, it saw Burney and was preparing to attack. The guys ran all the way to the front gate. Seamus shot the lock off the gate and they all piled into his car and drove straight into town.

Remembering that Cornthwaite had ordered a truck full of salt, they went to the Dodge lawyers to see if they could fulfill that order. Walter Dodge was a bit incredulous, but Seamus was able to persuade him to send the order through. Chaz stopped by the Sheriff's office to let them know about Seb Watkin's horse and to ask if there were any other law enforcement groups and if their uniforms were blue. "Nope," the Sheriff replied, "everyone here wears tan, just like me."

Knowing the salt truck would take a few days, they stopped at the library to find information about soldiers in blue uniforms. The librarian, Mrs. Susan Artwell then told them the story of John Fitzgerald, who fought for the Union and was shot in the head during the war. He survived but came back wrong in the head. He then murdered his family before killing himself. Thus began the Fitzgerald Manse curse.

Within a few days the truck arrived, and the three drove it up to Fitzgerald Manse. Seamus stayed up front, just in case, while Burney drove the truck to the entrance of the cellar. Chaz threw open the doors and was greeted by the monstrosity. Before it could react, Chaz took a blurry photo for proof and then opened up the truck, releasing a deluge of salt onto the thing.

The effects of the salt were almost immediate. The thing's death throes began to shake the house at it's very foundation. The walls began to bulge, causing large cracks to appear as windows shat teed and glass flew everywhere. Chaz had a few scrapes as he jumped into the truck with Burney and they sped away. In the end, the house collapsed onto itself, leaving a plume of salt and dust in the air.

This house is clean.

And tomorrow, the effects of them demolishing the house they were told not to demolish.

Burney needs to stop throwing things.

This session ended up being 95% combat and 5% finding a shotgun. I also learned how difficult it can be trying to run a combat on an ungridded map.

This session started off with Burney facing off against a tentacle thing, losing max SAN but failing his idea roll, so all his mind saw was a giant snake. Faced with another tentacle, Burney gave a yell to his companions and opted to throw his lighter onto a table containing piles of salt and gunpowder. Unfortunately he overthrew and was lucky he didn’t set the rug on fire.

Hearing Burney shriek like a girl, Chaz and Seamus rushed up to the master bedroom and were greeted by a pair of tentacles that oozed from the bricks within the fireplace. As I described them, it was as if someone took some dough and rolled it out into a tentacle like shape and was thrashing it about. Seamus took a shot at it and blew out a chunk, but it just seemed to coalesce and took minimum damage. Chaz ran in and flipped over the table containing the salt and was able to damage the tentacles and cause them to retreat.

Having found themselves a bit of a breather, Burney and Seamus went into the next room, the den, where they found a shotgun and gave it to Seamus. Chaz lingered in the upstairs hallway and decided to chance a look downstairs after hearing some odd gurgling sounds. He was greeted with a horror beyond all horrors, a monstrosity that should not have been. But he passed his SAN check and only lost 2 or 3 SAN points.

"Burney's mom wants to know if the boys want some Sunny D."

Of what Chaz could see, this thing had flowed over the entire first floor, blocking any chance of a downstairs escape. Several pseudopods reached up the stairs, trying to grab any thing that came within grasp. Chaz’s logic bade him to rejoin the group in the den and look out the window for a way out. Something was thrashing about outside, but it was difficult to tell what it was.

Remembering how the entrances of the master bedroom were lined with salt, Burney went into the room with the purpose of sealing off the fireplace. Two pseudopods had emerged and were waiting in the room. He jumped in and started throwing salt at the two creatures. Seamus and Chaz soon followed, with Seamus pulling out his pistol and shooting one of the tentacles. Chaz hung back, waiting for an opening to hit an ace. The two things thrashed about with no success.

Burney had a plan. Backing up a few steps, Burney lobbed the container of salt he was holding into the air so Chaz could bring THE THUNDER. Once again, Burney overthrew and hit the wall. Chaz’s THUNDER swished through the air. A tentacle attempted to hit Seamus with no success as the other one stretched itself to reach Chaz and Burney. Another tentacle squirmed out of the fireplace.

With his new-ish double barreled shotgun, Seamus unleashed a barrel onto a tentacle and hit. Burney brandished his axe and put a nice dent into the rug and floor. Chaz threw a handful of salt at the tentacle closest to him, throwing enough at it to make it dissolve into the ground, leaving a trail of slime from Chaz to the fireplace. The two tentacles attacked Burney and Seamus, and both were able to wrap themselves around the investigators.

As they struggled with the tentacles grappling them, they could do nothing but resist the unsavory thing the tentacles were trying to do to them. Seeing his partners in trouble, Chaz ran up to the fireplace and poured salt into the crevices and on to the tentacles, damaging them and effectively sealing the room.

But will his friends break free of the tentacles’ grasp before it kills them?

Never split the party. NEVER

The Crack'd and Crook'd Manse Session 5

This will all be explained to the players after we finish the adventure, but this session had a few red herrings.

Having discovered the message scrawled in the mirror, Burney and Seamus entered the master bedroom to do some more investigating. Burney started poking through Cornthwaite’s bureau but found nothing but clothes. However, upon spotting a gold-plated cigar case, he popped it open and grabbed two cigars for himself and gave one to Seamus. Seamus found an empty salt canister that had fallen under the bed. Salt was becoming a big thing for some reason.

Burney went over to the fireplace and noticed that it was oddly shiny. On a table, nine shotgun shells had been disassembled, and there were piles of shot, gunpowder, and salt. Noticing that the windowsills were lined with salt, Burney took a look out the window.

The raccoon was outside staring at him.

Back in the kitchen, Chaz tried opening one of the doors but found that the knob didn’t turn and would not open. Trying the door next to it, he found himself in the laundry room and poked around. Finding nothing but dirty clothes, Chaz left the room, and as he entered the kitchen, he saw something move out of the corner of his eye. A man in a blue uniform carrying a rifle had walked by the kitchen window, and he seemed to be heading in the direction of the shed. Not wanting to face this thing alone, Chaz ran upstairs to gather his party.

After telling the others what just happened, Chaz and Seamus stayed in the master bedroom and looking outside the windows, to see if they could spot whomever it was. Burney opened up the backdoor to track the intruder. He didn’t find a thing. After a bit of discussion, they decided that whomever it was had headed towards the shed, so it was time to check it out.

As they walked towards the shed, they noticed that the skies were starting to darken and thunder could be heard, and they realized that they would most likely have to spend the night. The shed was dark, ominous, and green. Chaz opted to stand watch outside as Seamus and Burney walked in. Tools and trash littered the floor. Noticing a space for an axe on the tool rack, Burney tried to see if the axe he found went there, but it didn’t. And then a hammer flew off a shelf and hit Seamus, knocking him down. Both freaking out, Burney tried to hoist Seamus to his feet, but failed miserably the first time. Still a bit dazed, Seamus struggled to get up, until Burney, using his superhuman stunt man strength, hoisted Seamus right up and the both barreled through the door, narrowly missing Chaz and almost knocking him down.

After some accusations of drinking and the rain started pouring down, Chaz decided if they were going to spend the night, he was going to get his gun. As he walked down the long driveway and the others went back inside, he smacked his head on a tree branch that he swore was not there before. Now muddied and covered in coal dust, Chaz marched on until he reach the front gate. Twice he tried to climb over, and twice he failed. Defeated, Chaz walked back to the mansion like a sad Charlie Brown. At least he still had Cornthwaite’s .45 revolver.

Back inside, the three decided to do a bit more investigating. Chaz found himself dodging a killer coat rack and the other two were in the library. Studying the shelves, they saw that the majority of the books were about exploration and archeology, but there were many gaps in between the books. Remembering the many instances of salt lining the entrances to rooms, Burney decided to run upstairs and grab the salt from the master bedroom. By himself.

After grabbing the salt, Burney turned to leave but heard this wet, sickening, slap hit the floor next to him. Spinning to see what it was, he was greeted by a doughy tentacle squeezing from the bricks in the fireplace, dripping onto the floor, multiple jaws chomping away at the air. Burney’s eyes went wide from the shock.

How will Burney get out of this?

Addendum: I ended the session on a cliffhanger because I thought we were going to be able to play the next day. We could not. Having lost 6 SAN after seeing the tentacle, I was going to start the next session with the player trying to fail an Idea roll. So for fun I had him roll at our lunch table and he failed it. He did enjoy rolling to see what would happen if he did make the idea roll and what type of insanity he would gain. It was the homicidal or suicidal tendency insanity that he rolled.

The Black Beast with Burning Red Eyes and Human Hands

The Crack’d and Crook’d Manse Session 4

Chaz and Burney were only stuck in the secret room for a small bit of time. Chaz was able to find a small trap door in the ceiling. As they pushed it open…

An Irish bootlegger was driving down the road towards the Fitzgerald Manse. Noticing a car parked outside it’s gates, he pulled up and saw that the gate was closed and locked. After jiggling with the locks for a bit but unable to open them, he climbed over the fence, with his guns, and entered onto the grounds. Seamus O’Hearne had returned and he marched straight up to the house. Not seeing his companions anywhere, he made a stop at the study, where he found an open book entitled The Missing People: The Tribe that the Jungle Swallowed. Not one to pass up a good book, Seamus made himself comfortable and decided to skim the book for an hour or so.

Chaz and Burney emerged into the dust filled attic of the mansion. Chaz opened some of the steamer trunks they had found but they were only being used for storage. Seeing a bit of light from the far corner, Burney headed towards it but found another steamer trunk that appeared to have burst open from the inside. He cautiously poked at the trunk with his newly acquired axe, but nothing jumped out and devoured him. Inside were various jungle clothing, a pith helmet, a compass, a .45 revolver, and a machete. Which Burney picked up. Chaz himself picked up the .45 revolver and as he leaned down to pick it up, he noticed that one of the pants pockets had burst open at the seams.

As they exited the attic, they heard some cursing going on downstairs. Figuring it was Seamus, they visited the study, where Seamus gave them the gist of the book he had read. Finding nothing else here, they went next door to the storeroom. Finding it filled with junk, Chaz noticed that the floor in the middle of the room was covered in mold and wet to the touch. Checking the ceiling to see if there was a drip coming from the room above, Chaz barely had any time before he heard the floor begin to crack and crumble beneath him. Plumes of black dust flew into the air as he fell into the coal cellar, blocking out all light from the room. As he sat there in the black, he heard something crawling towards him, it's jaws chomping as it searched for food. Chaz fired blindly into the room, and as the dust cleared and light re-entered the room, he saw that there was nothing in with him. Just a door that wouldn't open.

Burney and Seamus threw a rope down for Chaz to climb out, and then they hightailed it out of there. Jerks. They went into one of the upstairs bedrooms and found tracks in the dusty floor. As they tried to find where the tracks led, they began hearing scratching sounds coming from inside the room. Specifically, under the bed. Seamus drew his rifle as Burney inched over to the bed to give it a quick kick. As he did, a horrific black beast with burning red eyes and hands like a human emerged from under it and backed itself into a corner. Though slightly startled, the two realized that it was a raccoon and Burney opened up a window to shoo it out.

Having climbed out of the coal cellar, Chaz proceeded into the dining room and found that the table had been set for one. On the floor was some broken glass and little black specks. On closer inspection, he saw that it was ground pepper. Through another door, he headed straight into the kitchen. There he found several canisters of dry goods; sugar, coffee, tea, and flour. The salt canister appeared to be missing. As he walked into the pantry, Chaz was hit with a horrific smell of rot. Looking around the kitchen for a broom stick or a mop, he then used it to pop open the ice box. The smell became infinitely worse as he peered into the ice box and saw rotting food and flies and maggots. He quickly shut the box and the pantry door.

Finding nothing but a raccoon in the bedroom, the two upstairs opened a door and found themselves in a luxurious bathroom, complete with a granite counter top, a ivory claw-foot tub, and clean towels. That wouldn't have been all they had seen if they hadn't glanced at the mirror and saw "NaCL" scrawled in the dust. "What's nacl?" Burney said. Seamus gave me a quick bop on the head and told him that NaCL is the chemical formula for salt.

Things are starting to heat up as night is beginning to fall for the three investigators.